How to stop the doubts in your head and pursue your dream life.

November 3rd, 2023. As an aspiring Product Manager, I’m in a workshop related to the field.

I’m looking for mentors as I’m trying to land my first job, not exactly related to what I studied before, a Data Science Bootcamp.

I need contacts, and I need guidance.

But I also wanted to get out of my house and experience life, after so much time — an entire year — studying and working online.

I wanted to consider myself a cofounder at that point and told the people I met so. It’s hard for me, but I say it anyway, trying to avoid gulping as I do.

It’s hard for me to even explain the startup idea. What kind of cofounder I am? Probably one who has no idea what is he doing.

I didn’t know at the time that’s the same way most startup founders feel.

“What’s the biggest problem you’re facing right now?” the professor told us. “Write it down on a sticky note”.

Fuck, it’s clear to me: "How do I generate certainty on a startup?".

I read my note, as everyone in the group did. “I don’t think that’s the correct word,” said the man on my side. “There is nothing certain in life”.

It stuck to me.

Because I thought there was some project-management technique, some goal-setting, some system, that could give you certainty, that could give you a clear sense of progress, motivating me and my team forward.

The reality is that there is none.

Why we struggle

“True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing.“ — Seneca

It’s because we attach ourselves too much to our outcomes.

Our ego wants validation, we want to move up in the “social hierarchy”, we want instant gratification: fame, money, and sex.

And we want to present ourselves as having that or soon to achieve that, as soon as possible.

We want the validation now.

Then we struggle because progress is not linear.

Sometimes we move up, sometimes we move down, and sometimes we pivot, making a turn to a side.

Especially in entrepreneurship.

Others have subjects and grades. They know exactly what they will need to do to get to their goal: a bachelor's degree. We don’t.

We don’t know how long it will take to land our first client, make the first hundred or thousand dollars of online income.

We, and no one, can tell us when and if that will happen, especially ourselves.

Before making a living from this there are tons of doubts. “Will I be able to make it?”

Forward to today, December 1st, 2023. I am more confident.

• Left the IT internship I was in.

• Committed to publishing 1 newsletter a week for 6 months.

I am confident I can pursue to do what I love. Not in 5 years, not in a decade or two. Now.

I am confident that no matter what happens I’ll be okay.

How did this happen?

Goal-Setting → Fear-Setting

“Rehearse them in your mind: exile, torture, war, shipwreck. All the terms of our human lot should be before our eyes.” — Seneca

I knew I could be lent a hand in my entrepreneurial journey with a book that made one of the mentors who influenced me the most, Charlie Houpert, quit his (secure, high-paying, and remote) full-time job, and move to Brazil to start his venture: Charisma on Command.

That book is called The 4-Hour Workweek.

I loved to read it but procrastinated on doing the activities.

Why? There are uncomfortable, tough questions in there.

But there is something I know:

“That which we need the most will be found where we least want to look.” — Carl Jung

So I answered the tough questions, I did the tough activities.

This is what happened:

If 6 months go by and I still haven’t made a penny from this (aside from our first client, which is a friend of mine) that’s okay.

I don’t need anyone’s approval. I have mine, and the approval from my tribe, all three entrepreneurs.

I can come back to look for a job if I want to anyway. I can get back to university if I need to.

That’s the worst-case scenario.

In the most probable scenario, I’m making income and being able to make a living from what I love:

• creating content that inspires people

• coaching

• building life-changing communities and products

• helping other content creators to do the same.

Achieving this now, even if it takes me 12 months (which compared to a Bachelor is nothing), would have a permanent life-changing impact on my life:

• Confidence

• Autonomy

• Independence

• Purpose

Making a living (and improving daily) on the topics and skills that I’m most passionate about, knowing that the world is a place of abundance, and if I did it, others can too.

I can help them make that leap, as others, like Tim Ferris, Hamza, Dan Koe, Charlie Houpert, and my friends who are already making an income from content creation helped me.

What would happen if I don’t change?

For the next 5, 10, or 20 years I would be working to make a living, instead of living to make my life’s work.

I would be delaying my dream life:

Seeking how-tos, reading books and blogs trying to figure out how to do it, trying to find the perfect way, at the perfect moment, with the perfect idea.

Making some effort from time to time, but always half-assing it, as I was doing before.

Never truly starting. Suffering.

Look at what I wrote down:

1. Worst Case Scenario: The ambiguous “hell” in the back of your mind every day, Not defining it makes it worse than it is.

2. WCS Repairing: What would I do to minimize or repair the damage to the WCS? What would I do to get my finances back on track? (if you were fired right now, what would you do?)

3. Most Probable Scenario: What’s a more probable scenario? Would you at least have a moderate success?

4. I continue with my life as is: What would happen if I don’t make this change now and continue this way down the road?

Now, write your answers.

1. That invisible hell is a bad dream. Make it visible.

2. Think how you may fix it, or minimize the damage once it’s happening: If you were fired right now, what would you do?

   Now grade on a scale of 1-10: what will be the negative permanent impact of this in my life?

3. Now think about a more probable scenario. Would you at least have a moderate success? Grade from 1-10 the permanent positive impact of this more probable scenario.

4. What are the consequences of not making this change? What could happen down the road if you keep procrastinating the pursuit of your dream life?

Good. What are you waiting for now? Will you stay in fear, or will you take on the challenge and pursue your ideal life today?

Act before you feel ready (you’ll never do). Start now.

What is your next biggest step you could do in 5 minutes or less? Do it now.

And the next, for tomorrow? And the next, for the next day? Act. Your dream life is way closer than what you think it is. Mine already started. When will you start yours?